Are we CREEKING?
“The condition that separates hair runs from normal whitewater is that failure to make a certain move is not an
option. To miss a required boof, fail to catch a crucial eddy, or blow a critical line could easily result in
injury to the paddler or other members of the party that try to effect a rescue.” Forrest Calloway & Chris Koll
With the winter wet season in full swing here in the southeast, and spring runoff about to begin in the west and north,
creek boaters everywhere are gearing up. NOAA weather predictions will soon produce a flurry of discussion on message
boards and superstitious boaters will scold others for mentioning “sure” rain and jinxing everyone. Boaters will begin
to spend hours analyzing weather patterns and checking online gauges. Confused teachers and bosses will be trying to
figure out the mysterious 24 hour sicknesses that coincide with heavy rains. Creeking season is upon us!
Who are these creekers? Creeking is usually thought of as a run with steep drops, epic portages, and slides long enough
to make a water park jealous. But creeking is much more than that. So, how do you know if you are a creek boater?
Here are some questions to ask yourself:
You can’t tell your mom about most of your runs
There is brush in your grab handles
There is climbing equipment in your kayak
Someone ends the run bleeding
You have started coming up with new ways to pronounce “portaged”
"It can't be done" is an acceptable challenge
You are scared to death, but run the drop anyway
After that last drop there's something sloshing around in your boat, but it's too warm to be water
When staring at Niagra Falls you catch yourself looking for a line
You wear a rescue vest and you have used it
You have ever finish your run with a headlamp on
Your paddling group has its own form of sign language
You have more experience with pins than a seamstress
You need 4 wheel drive to get to the put in of your favorite run
The put in is so high you get a nosebleed
You have been doing drops so big you are thinking of flight school
You have time to rail grab on your boofs
You have used the sign for “wood” so much you have tennis elbow
You spend more time on slides than your 8 year old
You live in an apartment, but own two chainsaws
Going for a swim will later require dental work
If you’ve ever woken up to find your drytop frozen to the clothes line
You can predict rain more accurately than the meteorologist on channel 12
You have ever arrived at the put in to find the river frozen solid
You have attached a football facemask to your helmet
You have a mouthguard in the pocket of your PFD
You break both your ankles, but still paddle to the take out because you have too
Swimming involves serious injury
The hike out is harder than running the river
You have used your kayak as a sled
You know how to rig up your kayak as a backpack using one tie down strap
You have ever had icicles hanging from your helmet
You have pictures of yourself hiking in the snow with your kayak
Finally, a sure sign is if you drive four hours away from all civilization, up on a mountain, down a series of endless
dirt and gravel roads, and when you get there you still know everyone in the parking lot.
Got any more?
Email me!